This contest is made possible by the Speak Good English Movement, a nationwide movement to encourage Singaporeans to speak grammatically correct English that is universally understood.

Below are a few of the wrong sign that found in Singapore.

AH BENG the Crazy Singaporean.

Why did Ah Beng go to a movie with his 18 friends?

Because below 18 not allowed Lah!

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Ah Beng wants to buy a TV set. He goes to a shop.

Ah Beng : "Do you have color TV?"

Salesgirl : "Yes!"

Ah Beng : "Give me a green one, please"

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Ah Beng is filling up an application form for a job.

He supplied the information for the columns on Name, Age,

Address etc.

Then he comes to column on "Salary Expected", but he is not sure of the
question. After much thought, he writes "Yes"

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Ah Beng goes to a store and sees a shiny object.

Ah Beng : "What is that shiny object?"

Salesgirl : "That is a thermos flask."

Ah Beng : "What does it do?"

Salesgirl : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"

Ah Beng : "I'll buy it"

The next day, Ah Beng goes to work with his thermo flask

Boss : "What is that shiny object ?"

Ah Beng : "It's a thermos flask."

Boss : "What does it do?"

Ah Beng : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"

Boss : "What do you have in it !?"

Ah Beng : "Two cups of coffee and one cup of ice cream"

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

After taking photocopies of documents, Ah Beng always compares

it with the original for spelling mistakes.

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Ah Beng always smiles during lightning storms because he thinks

his picture is being taken.

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Why can't Ah Beng dial 911?

Because he can't find the number 11 (eleven) on the phone.

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it.

When he encountered some problems. He decide to use the 'Help'

Command after some tries.

Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer

Retailer for support.

Ah Beng: "I press the 'F1' key for help lah, but it's been

over half an hour and still nobody come and help me Lah?!"

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Ah Beng with two red ears went to his doctor.

The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he

answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone ring, lah - but

instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron

and stuck it to my ear, lah" "Oh dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief.

"But... what happened to the other ear?"

Ah Beng answered: "That stupid dumbo called back, lah!!!!"

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

Ah Beng talk to a long-distance telephone operator.

Ah Beng: "COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME THE TIME DIFFERENCE BETWEEN

Taipei AND LAS VEGAS?"

Operator: "JUST A MINUTE..."

Ah Beng: "THANK YOU lah" AND PUTS DOWN THE PHONE.

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

After completing a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for

quite some time, Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to

a friend.

"It took me ONLY 5 MONTHS TO DO IT", Ah Beng brags.

"FIVE MONTHS? THAT'S TOO LONG", the friend exclaims.

"YOU ARE A FOOL." Ah Beng replies, "SEE THIS BOX, IT IS WRITTEN

FOR 4-7 YRS".

-------? ? ? ? ? ?-------

At a bar in New York, the man to Ah Beng's left tells the

bartender," JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE"

and his companion says, "JACK DANIELS, SINGLE".

The bartender approaches Ah Beng and asks, "AND YOU, SIR?"

Ah Beng replies : "Tan Ah Beng, MARRIED lah"

Post By Elaine

喜欢，与爱的差别....
关于喜欢和爱，你，又明白了多少呢？~_^茫茫人海中，你爱过?*？

而你，又曾被深深地喜欢过呢？~_^

爱是她在的时候，眼睛里只有她一人；她不在的时候，一切都带有她的影子。

喜欢是在深夜看书时突然想起她，想象他现在做什么，心里漾起一阵轻飘飘的温暖，却从不主动给他打电话。几分钟后，注意力又重新被书中的情节吸引!

爱是在寂寞的夜里，思念如潮水般涌来，手里捧着书却怎么也看不进去，心里惦记着她此时是否还在加班，吃没吃晚饭，是不是如自己想着她一般想着自己..

喜欢是出门在外给他发个短信，告诉他这边的天气很好，然后把手机关掉，独自在异地疯玩一个星期，晒成一个黑人后突然出现在他面前吓他一跳。

爱是无论到哪都希望有他陪伴。可以站在海边给他打手机，让他听听海浪的声音；也可以因为在异乡的街道上看到一个酷似他的背影而愣在?*地久久不动。

喜欢是在受伤的时候，不想让他看到自己脆弱的一面，在他面前把眼泪悄悄抹掉，转? 芬廊皇且桓?快乐坚强的模样。

爱是在受委屈的时候，爬在他的胸前痛哭，没有伪装没有顾虑，把所有的烦恼统统告诉他，并渴望从他的怀抱中得到安慰。

喜欢是听她讲自己童年的趣事，然后哈哈大笑，心中涌起一阵莫名的感动。

爱是听她讲自己童年的趣事，然后微微一笑，心中更加怜惜眼前这个曾?*如此调皮捣蛋的傻女人。

喜欢是在楼道里碰上她，愉快的和她打声招呼，再简单寒暄几句，擦肩而过的时候看见了窗外明媚的阳光，心情无端端地好了起来。

爱是在楼道上看见她，脸上装出一副毫不在乎的表情，但在擦肩而过时细心感受身边颤动的空气，于是忍不住回头望一眼，看着她渐渐地离去。

喜欢一个人是想要她是自己的，所以，可以喜欢很多人，想要很多人都是自己的。

爱是明明离不开她，却要不得不放弃她，因为她要的幸福，我给不了。而我，也只能希望看她能够找到自己的幸福，即使那份幸福不是我给的...

喜欢是，希望寂寞的时候，无聊的时候，伤感的时候，找个人说说话。

爱是，在任何时候都想跟她分享，快乐的时候甚至希望把所有快乐都给了他。

喜欢是，在很久很久没联络的时候，接到她的电话，然后笑着听她说话。

爱是，在几天没有联络的时候，着急得的打电话给她，然后忍住眼泪笑一笑。